Wednesday, October 6, 2010

angela lansbury, come solve my mystery, please and thank you

Y'all, what is wrong with my sweet child? My sweet, sweet, potty-trained child? He went into the bathroom last week, stood in front of the toilet, and peed on the floor. Both yesterday and today he has not only declined the opportunity to sit on the potty, he has chosen to flail his arms and legs with the force of ten men in protest. My forehead almost met his stepstool this evening and he smacked my face with that ear-ringing open palm smack (gah!) all because the kid needed to try and poop and, guess what, I'd rather not have it all over my couch every single day. Wait, allow me to clarify. That makes it sound like I'd accept it every other day or something. NO. No poop. Never, please.

In cleaner news, Opa saved the day by fixing this beloved truck

thereby drawing attention away from Pink and Orange, which are thankfully now hiding behind the loveseat. (See, they really are there, and they're not going to move. If I move them, I WILL regret it. Oh, and that white thing is part of my blinds. Why have I not learned my lesson? Was it nineteen broken slats on the blinds in our last apartment before I finally took them down?)

Pink and Orange were threatening my sanity. They are just simple accordian tubes I picked up when my mom and I took Punkin to meet my sister for her birthday. He wasn't too keen on shopping, but these entertained him as we walked around.
The problem was that they soon became a source of self-stimming and barking. Normally when that happens, I can take the item away and tell him that we're "all done right now." Not so much with Pink and Orange. The tears were huge and they were from the heart. I am being forced to let this particular toy take its natural course through our lives. I'm sure we're not done with it yet, but the repaired truck that he's currently snuggling in bed with sure is a nice distraction.
Meanwhile he keeps asking for "pink," but he doesn't mean the pink tube. He means, as far as I can tell, an episode of SpongeBob. Which episode? I have no idea. Something to do with Plankton, I think. You're all welcomed to come over and play the, "Is this it?" game with him for a day. It's super fun. He doesn't become agitated at all. Neither do I.


blogzilly said...

If he was older I'd say it was the Schlitz Malt Liquor, but I think we can rule that out. Maybe the sights are a bit off or perhaps he is at the stage now that some young boys get to when they pee standing up where the 'games' begin. My mother tells me these are not fun times. Nor are the ones that involve, um...the more tugful type of activity.

She said one time at around age 5 I dropped my pants in front of a 3-way mirror at a Target and because of the optical illusion from a certain angle I got all jazzed up and start thwangin' my wee-wee saying 'Mommy look, I have 6 pee-pee's!!!

Laura said...

I love you, Lion! I wish I could show up dressed as Angela Lansbury for Halloween. Hang in there. Maybe the reemergence of the truck will help Punkin not dislike the potty!

Bonnie said...

I suck at that game, otherwise I'd come help you! I do have a lot of experience playing it, though.

Tova said...

I hope you get it figured out! That is one of those things that is a "boy thing" I think. I remember my younger brother loved to pee outside, and would often go out back even if the bathroom was free.

Kristiem10 said...

I just love you. "they soon became a source of self-stimming and barking." I am sorry, but I burst out laughing at the barking. I can totally see it happening here. And I like how they are named Pink and Orange. Only here they'd be called the pink and the orange. And, just so you know, the "Is this it?" game fails 9 out of 10 trials. Oh, sorry about that, I'm in IEP hell. I am thinking in goal/objective-speak.

Ginger said...

Boys and their anatomy....My girlfriend regaled me with a story of how her 6 year old son and his automatic toothbrush and his penis became best friends. And the "in private" discussion seemed to only kinda work, because while she was driving the car from the back she hears the tell tale sound of the toothbrush and her son saying, "look how it jumps Mommy!" Angela Lansbury wouldn't want to touch that with a 10 foot pole